More singing practice

It seems as though I’m wanted back at Glyndebourne next year, but that they want to audition me, as that’s the form. I’m already quite concerned about the marble steps outside the audition venue. If I remember rightly, they polish the varnished floor too. Still, I needn’t worry too much about the fact that I’m out of practice, as, in order to keep William entertained, I’m currently singing everyday. In fact, if I were to choose any of the ‘Balamory’ theme tunes for my audition piece, I’d be away. Perhaps I should postulate ‘Balamory – the Opera’ to the music staff. I’m thinking the Miss Hoolie/PC Plum/Archie the Inventor love triangle holds some pretty fruity possibilities, even to the uninitiated.

At least the discovery of the ‘Balamory Karaoke’ has briefly distracted the boy from the delights of the Teletubby website. For a short time, the repetition of Archie’s song was a small price to pay for the demise of Tinky Winky grooving to a distinctly shaky rendition of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. However, one of the many legacies of William’s Teletubby obsession is his use of the phrase ‘Again’. And even Archie’s song starts to pale the fourteenth time round. There are others that pale considerably more quickly.

William’s new game however, is imagining what Old Macdonald might have in his farm. The pattern goes – ‘Owd deedonnol ad dee edidant, Ee Ay Ee Ay O!’ An expectant look. Cue daddy doing elephant noises. You would imagine that this points to a fairly impressive menagerie for Old Macdonald. Elephants, however, are only the beginnings of Old Macdonald’s branching out. William’s imaginings of this farm include tigers, Teletubbies, Thomas, Bertie, cars, buses and, naturally, his sisters. This is all quite a test for my repertoire of sound effects. Where the imagination is really stretched, however, is when he decides that there are pens, nappies and panda books there too. I admit to the odd failure of inspiration, but quite enjoyed the nappy verse.

Perhaps this is the answer for the impending Glyndebourne audition. Rather than totter in and clatter my way through a bit of Mozart, I could suggest an interactive experience. Members of the panel could suggest farm animals for Old Macdonald, and I could incorporate them into the verses. I’d love to see what they came up with. I have a sneaking suspicion they wouldn’t hear my panda book impression though, which is a shame, as I’m quite proud of it really.